"If I was the Bionic woman, what would I wear?"

Its hard to rack up the base miles when its winter and you work a job that consumes 40+ hours of your time a week and day light is a precious commodity. The sun has been rising late into the 6Th hour and setting before 5:00. The temperatures have also been dipping into the low 40's and high 30's. Sometimes I think Santa Barbara and the Low Cal in general can really make a sally out of the average cyclist. I mean think about it... If there is even a 15 percent chance of rain the group rides around here are at half capacity. The attitude seems to be that it perfect training weather pretty much 98 percent of the year so why train in the rain...

WELL I SAY THAT SANTABARBARIANS ARE A BUNCH OF SALLIES!

Being young, inexperienced, and new to the sport of cycling... and below average fitness when compared with your average cat 3 Low Cal crit monger, I have devised a plan to stay one step ahead of the competition.

1) Begin morning rides well before sunrise in the arctic chill, while the competition lazily sleeps in awaiting warming, brighter training conditions.

2) Cary two water bottles... one for drinking and one to pour over my head to simulate rain... actually on second thought hydrating while training is for the weak... make that two bottles of rain.

3) Strap two ten pound weights to the frame of my bicycle.

4) Install flaps on all my kits to simulate parachutes and increase resistance.

5) Never eat on any ride less then 150 miles in length.

6) Carry a little bit of sand in my jersey pocket and periodically through it in the air before me to simulate sand storm and induce temporary blindness.

7) 6 hour night time training sessions one night a week from 10 PM to 4 AM.

8) Bicep curls 9 times periodically throughout the day in order to tone "Guns" for victory solute.

9) Disengage my brakes, spray paint white over my RUDY PROJECT lenses and do repeats down OSM.

9) Eat raw eggs, sea week, and spinach every morning.

10) Make stunning a habit.

So that is my new base training plan in a nutshell... What I lack in Genetics I will compensate for by letting the fore mention training plan discipline me in the way I have described.

But all jokes aside: If I was the Bionic Woman... what would I wear?

It is on like Donkey Kong!

(Photos: TOP LEFT: View from Gibraltar as the sun is threatening to wake taken at 6:38; BOTTOM RIGHT: view of the moon while riding home from work through HR that same night)